The wee house high in the redwoods
Is a studio just the goods
For a very artistic hermit.
The builders said, “Please,
For houses in trees
Is there any need for a permit?”
The council said—
“We can find no regulation
For a house in that situation
So it can be built
Howsoever thou wilt.”
So it was.
But then OSH said—
“More than two metres above the ground
Must have a very high fence all round,
And have you possibly forgotten
External stairs need gates at the bottom.
Please cover ditches and gutters
Glass windows must have shutters
And place a warning sign and back it
Up with helmet and hi-viz jacket.”
Then EQC said—
“You are listed in our book
So we can come and take a look
And put a little tick
Beside all measures seismic.”
And NES “CLEANAIR” said—
“You should have told us sooner
About that little schooner
For we are most reliant
On heaters all compliant.”
Then D.O.C said—
“We shall declare this place
A Nation’ly significant space.”
Internal Affairs then said,—
“A road in would enhance
And greatly help Tourism advance.”
And Communication Commission said—
“It really needs a cellphone tower,
And a pylon for the power.”
The Maoris and the Greens declared—
“But first we really must appease
The wounded spirits of these trees.”
Then local farmers joined their battle
Anxious for their sheep and cattle.
And while they all fought
Through every Tribunal and Court,
Audrey calmly took her ease
In her house up in the trees.